Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts, especially that you may prophesy. For one who speaks in a tongue speaks not to men but to God; for no one understands him, but he utters mysteries in the Spirit. On the other hand, the one who prophesies speaks to people for their upbuilding and encouragement and consolation. The one who speaks in a tongue builds up himself, but the one who prophesies builds up the church. Now I want you all to speak in tongues, but even more to prophesy. The one who prophesies is greater than the one who speaks in tongues, unless someone interprets, so that the church may be built up. (1 Corinthians 14:1-5 ESV)
When we live life in the Holy Spirit, with Him indwelling our lives and directing us into Christlikeness, He gives us gifts for ministry. This is not a pastor thing or a missionary thing. This is a disciple thing. Every follower of Jesus Christ who moves beyond believing He died for our sins and receiving forgiveness into the kind of surrender of our will to Him that results in our sanctification is both called to ministry and gifted for ministry.
In 1 Corinthians 12, the Apostle Paul gives us a list of the gifts of the Holy Spirit:
Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it. And God has appointed in the church first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, helping, administrating, and various kinds of tongues. Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? Do all possess gifts of healing? Do all speak with tongues? Do all interpret? But earnestly desire the higher gifts. (1 Corinthians 12:27-31 ESV)
Two of the gifts in Paul's list are various kinds of tongues and interpretation of tongues. As a charismatic Christian who believes the truth of the Word of God and believes in the operation of the spiritual gifts in the lives of believers today, I have seen the gifts of teaching and administration active in my life. However I have never been given the gift of speaking in tongues or interpretation of tongues. For many Christians who are less familiar with the gifts of the Spirit, tongues and interpretation seem mysterious and perhaps even a little weird.
I see three facets of the gift of tongues in the New Testament. The first is speaking in tongues as the gift of speaking a language one never learned to proclaim the gospel. This manner of speaking in tongues took place on the day of Pentecost when the Holy Spirit first filled the Church with His presence. The disciples gave glory to God, and the onlookers each heard them speaking their own languages. Missionaries have attested to incidents of receiving the supernatural gift of speaking in an unknown language in emergency situations on the mission field today.
The second facet of speaking in tongues is the giving of a message from God's heart to the church in worship. Paul tells of this gift of tongues in 1 Corinthians 14:
What then, brothers? When you come together, each one has a hymn, a lesson, a revelation, a tongue, or an interpretation. Let all things be done for building up. If any speak in a tongue, let there be only two or at most three, and each in turn, and let someone interpret. (1 Corinthians 14:26-27 ESV)
This facet of speaking in tongues becomes the giving of a prophetic word in a heavenly language, with the gift of interpretation being exercised so the whole body understands the word from the Lord. Throughout chapter 14, Paul tells the Corinthians that it is much better for all the gifts to operate to build up the church, than for the gift of tongues to operate in the life on one believer to build up their own life.
I thank God that I speak in tongues more than all of you. Nevertheless, in church I would rather speak five words with my mind in order to instruct others, than ten thousand words in a tongue. (1 Corinthians 14:18-19 ESV)
The third facet of the gift of tongues is its expression as a prayer language for a believer. While I have never spoken in tongues myself, I have been present when others I trust and respect have prayed in tongues for healing and deliverance. This prayer language is what Paul refers to in 1 Corinthians 13:1: If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. This gift of prayer language seems to be an intimate communication between the Spirit of God and one's own spirit that fills a believer with love and peace.
I do not see anywhere in 1 Corinthians 12 through 14 where Paul teaches that one is not filled with the Holy Spirit unless one speaks in tongues. Quite the contrary, Paul teaches that the Holy Spirit apportions the gifts to whom He wills, and not all prophecy or teach or do miracles or speak in tongues. I have asked God for the gift of tongues and He has not chosen to give it to me. Instead He has gifted me with other spiritual gifts for ministry. I am content with that and give thanks for it, while remaining open to the operation of any other spiritual gifts that have not yet manifested in my life.
Paul's overarching teaching here is that the gifts of the Spirit are given to build up the Body of Christ and empower ministry, and they are not badges of spiritual specialness that are worn in pride. There is no place in the Body of Christ for one Christian to claim, "I speak in tongues and you don't, so I'm more spiritual than you are." The foundation of all of them is love, beautifully described in chapter 13.
The key to operating in any of the gifts of the Spirit is surrender to Jesus Christ, which leads to the infilling of the Holy Spirit. That gives Him freedom to mold and shape our lives in Christlikeness and to manifest the spiritual gifts in our lives for ministry to others. The gifts of the Spirit are not something to be feared as weird. They are to be embraced for ministry. And their operation in our lives is baseline normal in the Kingdom of God.
Draw near to Jesus. Surrender to Him. He will fill you with His Spirit and gift you to do the ministry you are designed for. It is normal and not weird. And the operation of the spiritual gifts will show the world that the Spirit of God can and will dwell in a human life and minister to others through them. All for the glory of God!